Questions You Shouldn’t Ask a Recovering Addict

Someone going through recovery will need continuous support. Support can come in various ways, from offering a listening ear to creating a safe space for sharing thoughts and feelings to providing certain instrumental help. Sometimes, support can be as simple as asking questions. That way, you can ensure the person is doing well and communicating their needs. However, there are questions you shouldn’t ask a recovering addict, and we at Tranquility Recovery Center would like to warn you about some frequent mistakes and how to avoid them. 

We want to help you understand why certain questions can be harmful and come across the wrong way. Rather than just offering you examples of poor communication, we will provide you with several tips on how to communicate in a thoughtful way that can encourage healing and growth.

Why Certain Questions Can Be Harmful

While you probably have good intentions when intending to talk to a recovering addict, your words can be interpreted differently than what you imagined them to mean. Depending on how you phrase your questions and when you decide to pose them, they might come off as judgmental rather than supportive.

It’s not unusual for words to trigger certain thoughts, beliefs, or emotions. When it comes to recovering addicts, while they’re still in the stage of healing, your questions can bring about guilt, shame, or stress. Therefore, it would help everyone if you would learn about things not to ask someone in recovery.

Examples of Inappropriate Questions

Here are a few examples of inappropriate questions for recovering addicts.

“Why did you start using in the first place?”

You might ask this because you’re truly curious or believe that by asking this question, you can bring about reasons for not using it. However, this can be a highly triggering question as it can come across as judgmental. Rather than being curious about what led them to addiction, show curiosity about their progress. That way, you’re focusing on achievement rather than past mistakes.

“How long have you been clean?”

This question can create unnecessary pressure, especially for those who just got out of drug detox in Los Angeles. It focuses on timelines and diminishes daily victories. Instead, reframe this question to celebrate milestones that your loved one can be proud of. By focusing on achievements regardless of how small they are, you’re helping your loved one feel better about themselves and stay motivated about their recovery journey. 

“Don’t you miss it?”

This banal question can be highly hurtful. It trivializes the struggle your loved one is going through as well as their efforts to remain sober. If your idea was to highlight their strengths in overcoming struggles with addiction, focus on them by acknowledging your loved one’s success in overcoming cravings. 

“Are you sure you’ll stay clean this time?”

The skepticism brought about by this question can damage your loved one’s confidence. While you might be worried about the possibility of relapse, you should show faith in your loved one’s recovery. Doubt about your loved one’s capacities to overcome addiction struggles can be hurtful, particularly to those who may face mental health issues and need more support from a dual diagnosis treatment center in Los Angeles.

“What was the worst thing you did while using?”

Your loved one had to address their behavior while at inpatient rehab Los Angeles. Still, it will take time to accept them and make amends. Asking questions like this can reopen old, unhealed wounds and reinforce shame. Instead, focus on their growth and achievement since the beginning of recovery.

The Power of Thoughtful Communication

There is more to successful communication than just avoiding questions you shouldn’t ask a recovering addict. Creating a safe space and uplifting environment is the key to making someone feel comfortable about sharing thoughts and feelings and their recovery experience. Here are several practical tips on how to do that:

• Listen without judgment. Practice asking questions that do not seem condemnatory. Try to reflect on what your loved one is saying and offer support rather than evaluation.
• Use affirming language. Demonstrate and support the value of an individual’s identity. Avoid bias and maintain openness to learning about your loved one’s experience. 
• Respect their boundaries. Whether it’s them saying no to your suggestions or communicating what they need from you, be sure to acknowledge and respect it. It’s an important element in their recovery.

How Tranquility Recovery Center Encourages Healing Conversations

It might seem from everything mentioned above that words can be harmful and hurtful. While this is true, we need to remember that words also have healing power, which is why talk therapy is showing so much success when treating addiction. We at Tranquility Recovery Center know that the best. Our treatment programs always incorporate various types of psychotherapy and provide opportunities for communication that can heal.

We nurture compassionate communication at each step of the recovery process. Our personalized support refers to customized communication to ensure our words bring peace and a sense of belonging to people of various backgrounds and with different addiction stories. Nevertheless, we strive to create safe spaces where open, non-judgmental dialogue thrives. You can count on feeling safe, seen, and accepted whether you’re in individual or group therapy.

FAQs: How to Support a Loved One in Recovery

What’s the best way to show support without overstepping?

The simplest way to provide support one needs is by simply asking what would help them. Some people want to share their stories, while others want to keep things to themselves. Your loved one might benefit more from small acts of service than a conversation they’re not ready for. If, however, they wish to speak, be sure to actively listen and not judge. 

How can I educate myself about addiction and recovery?

Turn to renowned and trustworthy sources for information. Take advantage of the content on our website or consult entries on recovery at the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA). Finally, you can participate in psychoeducation and workshops organized by recovery facilities.

Building a Supportive Network

Meaningful recovery is a team effort involving compassion and understanding. Knowing which questions you shouldn’t ask a recovering addict and how to engage in compassionate communication is the key to success. If you are unsure how to communicate to support your loved one’s recovery, contact Tranquility Recovery Center. Call today and ensure your words have a healing power.